Growing through ...... Irony?

Some things in life are either funny, or sad, or give us cause to think of things in a different way. That's what metaphor does, and so much of what we read, hear, and say are metaphors..... a way of saying or conveying something that makes you think of something else, or a way to teach something, or to get you thinking in a whole new or different way.  At least for me that's the way it often works. 

In some day-to-day common life circumstances, some things seems so ironic that we sometimes have to do a double-take to make sure that what we think we're seeing is what we're actually seeing.  Such as it was for me one morning as I was driving in to the office.  And, after a little chuckle to myself, I spent the time driving pondering the lesson of what I had just seen.  What am I supposed to take away from this? 

So.... it happened this way.  As I came through an intersection near my home, I noticed that the "turn around" lane that went under the bridge..... you know, that U-turn express lane that allows you to turn around without having to wait through the traffic lights?  Yeah, that one.  Anyway, I noticed that the U-turn lane was backed up.  "Well, that's not right" I thought to myself, and proceeded to go under the bridge.  That's when I could see what the back up was..... a big 18 wheeler, stopped cold in all 18 of it's tracks.  No one could get around it.  But wait..... I thought.... as I rounded the corner..... it's OK!!!  There's a tow truck right in front of it.  It will be out of there in only a few minutes.  But, as I completely turned the corner, getting on the other side of the intersection, I noticed that is wasn't the 18 wheeler that was broken down, but the tow truck!  Uh oh!  What happens when it is the tow truck that's broken down?  I guess he has to call the Daddy Tow Truck. 

So, what happens when the caretaker gets sick?  What happens when the healer is wounded?  When the child becomes the parent?  What happens when your trusted spiritual friend..... the one on whom you rely to give you support and encouragement..... becomes discouraged?   Are we sometimes called to a kind of role-reversal?  Are we called to grow emotionally and spiritually, so that we can become the caregiver, the healer, the encourager?  (ANSWER:  YES!).  God calls us to learn and grow.  And yes, it can be....IS..... scary.

These are the thoughts that crossed my mind for the next 20 minutes, and beyond, as I made the drive from home to church.  In fact, I pondered this most of the day.  So.... what does this say to you?

OK.  One more "ponderance."  What happens when we take the last garbage bag out of the box?  The box becomes the garbage, and in a shocking turn of events, goes INTO the garbage bag. 

Hummmmm..... I wonder if there is a lesson here?  Who knows!

The Devil Made Me Do It!

Well, it seems that I have a new alter-ego.  (Or, maybe that's "altar" ego, haha!)  Anyway, the now famous (or, maybe it's more like "infamous") Pastor Neecy came on the scene at the talent show on Oct. 15, and things just aren't quite the same.  Mailman Stevie just seems to get her going!

One of the things that Pastor Neecy seems concerned with is that old rascal "Satan."  Nasty guy, that Satan.  Seems that he's the cause of all our downfall..... all our ills...... all our misfortune!   Of course, it can't be anything with us...... it's all Satan.  That way, we don't have to take responsibility.  Or...... do we?

Through the ages "the devil" or "Lucifer" or "The Evil One" or "Satan" has been blamed for everything from the fall of "man," to the betrayal of Judas.  Comedian Flip Wilson (from the 1960's and early 70's) even had a whole act built around "The devil made me do it!"   Well, who knows..... maybe so.  But in reality, the concept of Satan runs much deeper than that.  Volumes and volumes have been written throughout the ages.  Names for "him" have been analyzed from the Hebrew and Greek.  And, there are still many questions.  When did this character actually appear in ancient writings?  What does "his" name mean?  How are we to understand this "character."  I could go on and on.

My question, however, is why do we try to embody that which is within our own humanity, our own character, as a kind of stereotypical "red devil" with a long spear-like tail, and horns?   Someone, or something, that we can blame our own mistakes and bad judgment on?  Who, or what, is this adversary?  I'm not saying that there is not evil..... REAL evil..... in this world.  I'm just saying that before we blame some real or imagined catalyst for our own mistakes, lapses in judgment, bad attitudes, bad decisions, and the ensuing consequences, we should first be looking deep within ourselves to see what the root cause is.  And that, my beloved, is our humanness.  That is our human condition.  It includes all of us! 

So, next time you blame something or someone else for a bad decision on your part, just ask yourself, did the devil really make me do it?.... or, do I take responsibility.  Just sayin'......

By the way, if you've never experienced Flip Wilson's "The Devil Made Me Do It," it's a classic!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SLifea3NHQ

Balance, Baby, Balance!

I hit the snooze alarm 3..... no wait.... 4 times this morning.  I was tired, because last night I stayed up real late.  I'm trying to balance family time with work and ministry time, school time, and self care time. 

I made a long list this morning.  Then I prioritized it.  But, as the morning goes on, I find that I am re-prioritizing it...... and adding to it as well.  Trying to find balance within ministry.

In April, I once again filed an extension on my income taxes.  Trying to balance my personal life and ministry.  Now, the Oct. 15 extended deadline is clawing at my backside, and I have not yet begun to organize my tax stuff.  Trying to balance something, but I'm not sure what.

I am experiencing joy beyond belief because I love ministry, I love my church, and I love my family.  Oh, yeah..... and I love God, too.  (Wait a minute!, Something is out of balance here......I need to re-order that list.  I love God, love my family, love ministry, and love my church..... yeah, that's much better)  Yet, I find that I am anxious much of the time.  Why?  Balance, baby, balance!  

I tend to be a perfectionist.  I tend to be a workaholic.  I tend to over-focus and over-function.  So, what's the result of that huge vacuous black hole of (lack of) balance to which I have just confessed?  Over-failure.  And, missing out.  At least in my mind.  So, I try harder and vow to do better.  But then I have to ask myself, as Dr. Phil would say, "How's that workin' for ya?"  Not well, Dr. Phil.  Not well at all. 

For me, the answer to this fuzzy.  It shouldn't be, but it is.  It's easy to sit down and write a list of priorities, and then re-prioritize the list as I add to it.  It's easy to say "I should have, I ought to have," or "I'm gonna start doing this, or I'm gonna start doing that."  The hard part is in follow through.  So, I find that for me the answer is often in a short "time out"  through spiritual renewal in retreat in silence and solitude, boundary setting, and good old fashioned self care.  But, the opportunities for that are rare.

Balance is an on-going action.  It's not just some kind of adjustment that you make once, and then you're set.  Someone once wrote about how a tight-rope walker uses a balancing pole, because they are constantly using it to shift weight here or there to stay in balance and not fall ........ it's on-going.  The same thing goes for our day-to-day lives.  We have priorities and routines, but then life happens..... that which is in the unseen.  Yet, one thing to remember is that God is in the unseen.  Nuff said?  Say yes!

So, in the meantime, I'll make my lists, file my extensions, and fall on my face.  But, I'll get back up again, because God picks us up, dusts us off, and gives us yet one more "do-over."  It's called grace.  And it usually comes with a lesson learned.  Not so that we can try harder and do better, but so that we can grow in God's grace. And the best part?  It's a gift!  It is God's gift of love to us.

Listen to your heart.  Listen to your body.  They won't lie to you, because the messages we get here are from the Holy Spirit..... God's presence within us.  And the message?  Balance, baby, balance!

A Divine Reminder

Well, Trisha always keeps me on my toes.  Thanks, Trisha......I think. 

Anyway, Friday's "inspirational thought" read as follows:  (Did you see it?)

My car has warning lights on the dashboard. Every once in a while when I am driving, one of them flashes bright red. When it does, I stop and turn the engine off. God has His own warning lights, and at times He flashes them, saying to us, "Stop, stop, don't, don't!" And if we're wise, we stop. We use the necessary, disciplines that keep our minds pure, and He does His part in honoring that obedience.

Such warnings are all around us, in the everyday parts of life that we often just IGNORE.  But, I want to take the inspirational message above just a bit further.  If some warning lights tell us to "Stop!  Stop!", then I also propose that other warning lights might be renamed "invitation" lights.  These lights, instead of staying "stop," would instead invite us to "GO!  GO!"   So...... if we are to heed the warning, or respond to the invitation, what am I to make of the invitation light in my Jeep that told me to "perform service?" 

The Big 3

In United Methodist circles, when we think of a "Big 3" we usually think of the Trinity; Father, Son, Holy Spirit.  In the Bible, the number 3 is used often.  Sometimes it is used as a literal number, sometimes it is used figuratively, or metaphorically, because in the 1st century world the number 3 was considered to be a divine number..... a perfect number. 

But what has been on my mind lately is another kind of "Big 3," the kind that relates to our health...... body, mind, and spirit.  So, how's your "Big 3?"

How is it with your physical health?  Would your diet send the healthy food gurus screaming into the night?  Are you stressed?  Did you know that stress can cause a myriad of physical problems?  What about exercise? (ouch!)

How is your intellectual health?  Do you read?  Do you challenge yourself to learn new things? 

How is your spiritual health?  John Wesley used to ask, "How is it with your soul?"  Do you spend time with God daily?  Do you see the divine in the everyday?  How is your prayer life?  Do you take time to shut out the daily chaos, and devote that time to silence, so that you can hear the "still small voice" that is the voice of the Holy Spirit...... God dwelling within us?  Do you take Sabbath time?

Well, I scored poorly!  I rarely exercise, and I occasionally let stress get the best of me.  I tend to always be reading and studying, so I did a little better on that one.  My spiritual health?  Room for lots of improvement.  So, I am committing today to intentionally develop better habits in the "Big 3." 

How 'bout you?  How's your "Big 3?"  Upon what is God calling you to focus? 

Wanna join me?  Let's go for it!

Stop and Smell the.....OUCH!

I know..... I know.  You're as sick of them as I am.  Those old cliches that have lost their meaning (to us) because they have been too oft quoted.  The one that comes to my mind today is "stop and smell the roses."  Yeah, and get your nose poked.  That one has been so overused, that it has lost it's "fragrance" of meaning.  So, we skip right over it, or let it go "in one ear and out the other."  (Sorry!  Just couldn't resist that one.)

So, let me "cut to the chase."  (Oops.... I did it again, didn't I?) 

A friend of mine shared this with her congregation: 

"God wants us to discover new ways of doing and being a church, unlike the traditional models that are out there. God wants us to create an environment in which people experiment and take risks in ministry; where they come up with great, new ideas, and get others excited to help implement those ideas. God’s vision for (our church) is for us to have lots of different opportunities throughout the week for worship, prayer, conversation, and support, for all ages....."
                                (Rev. Sheila Fiorella, pastor, New Day United Methodist Church, Mansfield, Texas)

Vision.  It sometimes (more often than not) means change.  And, it may mean that we become uncomfortable with change.  That's OK.  If you feel uncomfortable with certain changes, rejoice in that, because that's God telling you that this is growth..... it is God calling you to grow individually, and it is God calling us to grow as a church..... as the Church of Jesus Christ.  What a gift!  Embrace it!  Give thanks for it!

Sometimes, smelling the rose is painful.  So, maybe we've stopped smelling them altogether.  How sad, because there is such beauty in the fragrance.  (OK, enough cliches and metaphor).

What vision does God have for Davis Memorial United Methodist Church?  What vision do you have for Davis Memorial United Methodist Church?  How will we carry out that vision? 

I am excited to be a part of God's ministry at Davis Memorial, and I am excited to partner with all of you in ministry as together we vision, dream, discern, and carry out God's plan for us in growing the kingdom, becoming and being the best that we can be for God, as we go about making disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world!

Did I Ever Tell You About The Time........

Growing up, I was exposed to the Bible, especially those stories that we usually think of as "kid" stories; that is, Adam and Eve, Noah's Ark, Daniel and the Lions Den, Jonah and the Big Fish, (or Whale, as has become popular).  After that were the stories of Jesus, especially baby Jesus in a manger.  As I got a little older, my elementary knowledge of things biblical expanded with other stories and characters such as the Apostle Paul.  Of course, even as a child, we knew the "kid friendly" version of the crucifixion, but mostly through the post-view eyes of the resurrection.  But, how did all of this fit in together?  Why are the stories important?  How did one story influence others?  Did Adam and Eve journey to Bethlehem, where they were thrown in to the Lion's Den?  And, weren't they rescued by the Apostle Paul, who wrote that famous bumper sticker "The Lord is my Shepherd"?  And, who the heck are these people "the Jews?"

As I became a young adult, I became fascinated with the writings of the prophet Isaiah, and (what I perceived to be) the stories of Jesus.  But wait!!!  Isaiah was in the Old Testament, which was..... BEFORE Jesus..... wasn't it?  And even though I would read the Bible, and try to understand what it was saying to me, I still did not have a clear "framework" of the stories and their chronology.  To me, they were just that..... stories..... probably designed to get me to think about God.  But, what am I supposed to think about God? 

Then, years after Steve and I were married, God.... through the work of the Holy Spirit.... put within our hearts a hunger for the Bible.  As we learned the chronology, the stories, and the characters, suddenly the scripture readings in church and the sermons became deeply meaningful, because they now made sense.    But, how..... you might ask...... did you learn all of this.  Seems daunting..... overwhelming!  Well, in some ways it was, but in some ways it wasn't.  When God sets God's "mind" to something, it happens.

To cut to the chase...... we entered a basic bible study which dealt with the chronology and the characters and places in the Bible.  In addition to that, we decided to get a wonderful tool called "The Daily Chronological Bible" which synthesizes all of the bible stories into one cohesive whole, divided out into one year's worth of daily readings, along with commentaries.  But, that takes discipline!!  Yeah, it does.  So, that reminds me..... Did I ever tell you about the time that Steve and I were reading that daily bible together?  We spent time every day, usually during a mealtime, to read that day's reading.  Well, luckily for me, my husband is very disciplined, for in those times when I would want to blow off the day's reading, he would read it to me.  I remember one day that I told him, if we're gonna read that thing today, you're gonna have to follow me around while I vacuum and read it out loud to me."  Well, that's exactly what he did.  And, with his diligence and committment and willingness to hold me accountable, we finished that one year bible a couple of months early.  And our lives were changed!

So, here's my challenge.  If your basic knowledge of the "framework" of the Bible is..... well, less than accurate..... get yourself a "Daily Chronological Bible" and begin that journey!  Maybe we'll start a class?  But, just remember, if you need someone to hold you accountable, ask Steve to follow you around while you vacuum!

Looking for Your Lesson

There I was, once again, at the grocery store.  I wasn't particularly in a hurry, yet I wanted to just go ahead and get what I needed and hit the road..... on to bigger and better things, such as a nap and some general "rot down" time.  So, needless to say I was in my own world, in deep comtemplation of what I would find along the grocery aisle in which I found myself.  And then, that's when I stumbled all over it.

You see, as I mindlessly made my way down the aisle, I heard a voice behind me calling "mam!  mam!"  There was a sense of urgency in the voice.  I heard it again, and turned around to see a man pushing a shopping cart, at a rather quick pace, toward me.  As I was trying to process what this might be all about, he whizzed right past me to the woman in front of me..... the woman whom I did not even notice.  This woman was toting (or, trying to tote) a case of bottled water, and two or three other items of significant weight and bulk.  The man, who had the cart and only a bag of chips, pushed the cart right up to the woman, and insisted that she take the cart, helping her to put the items in the cart.  Instead of being off in his own world, as I was, he was aware of a need, and was quick to take action.  She smiled and thanked his profusely.  And I had found my lesson.

One year on the senior high CTCYM mission trip, at evening worship, I did a short meditation called "looking for your lesson."  It was something that I myself had learned as I worked at the work site, "serving" others.  It was the lesson that God had for me, and my task that evening was to share it with the group. Yet, during the week, I became very aware that God was placing "lessons" in my life all through the week, all during the day.  I began to see it in the client.  I began to see it in the youth work teams, and I began to see it in the community.  It wasn't so much what we were there to "do," but also what we were there to learn.  I'll leave the details out for now, because I have a great sermon on grace that I will share with you one day..... a lesson on grace that was my lesson for the day.  And it was on that day that I realized that God's lessons for us are in the everyday, the ordinary, the common..... and sometimes (make that most times) we have to open our eyes and our hearts, and look for our lesson..... for that which God would have us learn.  In other words, to ask ourselves, "What does God have for me today in this circumstance, in this person, or in this place?  How is God speaking to me"  And rest assurred, there is ALWAYS a lesson from God.  That's what happens when we stay open to that which God is doing in our lives every day, and every minute.  Sometimes it is blatant, like the 'ol 2x4 over the head.  But, most of the time it is subtle..... more like the "sound" of the silence in which God came to the prophet Elijah.  (1 Kings 19:11-16).

So, next time you're in the grocery store, or at work, or sitting in a drive through, come out of your own little world and ponder that which God has for you.  You just might be surprised where and how you'll find your lesson when you look for your lesson...... by opening up your heart to God and God's work in your life and in the lives of those around us. 

Full Moons, Cardinals, and the Holy Spirit

Well it's my last night in Kentucky.  It has been a wonderful, albeit intense, week.  My days have been filled with learning, yet it never felt like "class."  Our professor, Dr. Seamands, is truly a "pastor's pastor."  He begins each class in the morning with a devotion and message, which smoothly segues into our time of learning.  But not only do we learn together, but we pray together, and share together.  We've had some wonderful theological discussions, but it doesn't seem at all like "class."
 
And so tonight, as I was reflecting back on this past week, I ventured outside to take in the beauty of the evening, and to spend some quiet time with God.  It's 72 here, as in degrees!  There was a slight breeze, and the air was wonderful.  And as I walked out, my breath was snatched away by a beautiful, beacon-like, and oh-so-full moon.  And, earlier this evening, my new friend Carolyn (who is a UM pastor in Weston, WV) and I were walking across the campus after having dinner together.  As we rounded a corner, the most brilliant red Cardinal flew just in front of us.  He landed in a tree, and as I watched him, Carolyn directed my attention to the green lawn just below, and there, sitting very still and being intensely cute, was a bunny!

Now, in and of itself, this makes for a wonderful ending to a wonderful week.  But what really struck me, in this time and in this place, is the fact that there are 2 things that have always reminded me of God's presence, and whenever I see either of them, I stop to soak in, and ponder the presence of the Holy Spirit.  And what are those two things?  Well, cardinals and a full moon.... both of which I experienced this evening.  Both of which I experienced after an intense day of learning, sharing, and prayer.  Both of which I experienced at the end of a week of growing in God's grace..... fulfilling a dream to not only be a pastor, but to be the best pastor that I can be..... that God called me to be, and that God created me to be.  

Tomorrow I fly home.  It will be sooooo good to be back home with my family and my church.  Thank you for the privilege of returning to school so that I may continue to grow.  Thank you for walking with me for the next few years as a student here at Asbury as we, (that is, God, you, and me), partner together to become all that we can be for God's kingdom, for future disciples, and for our own spiritual growth.  And I thank God for the privilege of serving as your pastor.  It is an honor, and a joy. 

I have missed you all, and I very much look forward to seeing you in worship on Sunday!  Grace and peace, Denise

Back to School

I arrived in Lexington Kentucky around 1:00pm on Friday, and I have not stopped since.  After leaving the airport and arriving at the Asbury Inn, I stowed my gear and took a walk around the town (Wilmore KY, which is just a few miles outside of Lexington).  It was amazingly green, as there had been rainshowers all week long.  And, the temperature was nice too, somewhere in the 80's.  By 5:00, I had returned to the Asbury Inn for a gathering of those of us who are beginning this new adventure called "going back to school."  There were introductions, dinner together on the campus, and then a short program overview.  Saturday was a day-long orientation, including lunch together, a tour of the campus and library, and dinner together off campus.  Sunday was a welcome day off in which I spent the morning in worship at Wilmore UMC, and then lunch and a walk around town.  It was a beautiful day, and a little warm for the folks in KY, but not for this Texas girl!  The rest of the day and evening was spent in silence and solitude.

There are two different classes in session this week, and the class in which I am involved has only 5 people,.....we are a good mix.  4 ladies, and 1 guy.  3 clergy, and 2 laity.  2 United Methodists, 1 Wesleyan (slightly different from the UMC), and 2 others from other denominations.  This has made for wonderful conversation and dialogue.  We are becoming fast friends, and with only 5 of us there, it is easier to get to know each other more quickly. 

In the whirlwind of travel, orientation, books and reading, and paper preparation, there is a lot I have already learned.  So, what is the most valuable thing/lesson that I have learned so far?  I have re-learned to spend time with God.  Purely and simply.  In addition to the theological discussions and lectures, we start our day with 1 beautiful and sacred hour devoted to opening ourselves up to, and centering on God..... and on the work of the Holy Spirit.  We begin with devotion time, a kind of meditation from our professor, and prayer.  And today we even celebrated Holy Communion.  It made a difference in the day, and it was a holy difference. 

I am grateful for this time to come and grow in God's grace.  And, I am grateful for my Davis family.  I will pray for you while I am gone.  Will you pray for me as well?  Grace and peace to you, my brothers and sisters in Christ.  Denise

What's in your promise?

A funny thing happened on the way to the office today.  A truck passed by me on the freeway, and the reason it caught my attention was because it was like a tanker truck, but it was small..... maybe about one half to one third the length of a regular tanker truck.  Since it had already caught my eye, I noticed an odd thing printed on the back. It said "Carrying Political Promises."  Just as I was trying to figure out what this could possibly mean, I noticed the smaller print just above that slogan, which read "Cornish-Burton Septic Service."  Well, I thought that was the funniest thing I had ever seen. 

But anytime I think of the word promise, I just can't help but think theologically.  That is, about God's promises to us, and those promises we make to God as well.  Let's just leave it at that.  Nuff said. 

So..... what's in your promise?

Pressing On

When my kids were little, we used to travel a lot.  One of our favorite places to visit was the majestic redwood forest of Northern California.  To me, the trees were mighty but gentle giants that welcomed us into their midst.  Needless to say, I took so many pictures that I could wallpaper a room with them. 

When our daughter was about 18 months old (she's now 23), we took one of these trips to California.  In the redwood forest that day, I snapped a random picture of my husband and our daughter as they strolled, hand in hand, along the path among the giants...... almost as if my precious ones were being enfolded and protected by them.  When we returned home, I put this picture in a picture frame, put it on a shelf, and it became a part of my life.  Yet the danger in that is that when something becomes so much a part of our life....our daily routine, the specialness of it can become ordinary and commonplace.  But then, sometimes God places a prompting in our heart that helps us to look at that which has become ordinary and routine with new eyes, and a new heart. 

And so, that is precisely what happened to me one day as I was beginning the process of entering into ordained ministry.  I had just been accepted into seminary, and did not really know what lay down the road.... obstacles, pathways, pain, joy, failure, success..... all of these entered into my mind, and I allowed self doubt and fear to creep into the joy of the call.  Then, an odd thing happened..... a common thing suddenly became  new.  My eyes fell yet again upon the picture of my daughter and my husband, strolling hand-in-hand, along the redwood giants.  All of the sudden, a verse from Philippians came into my mind:   I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:14 NIV).  Suddenly, I viewed the picture through new eyes, and I received within my very being an assurance that it was all "gonna be ok."  (notice here that the message was "gonna be OK", not "gonna be easy.")  Peace flooded my soul as I once again looked at the picture, but this time saw something new and different.  This time, I saw myself, hand-in-hand with God, walking among the giants.....guided, protected.  What I also saw in the picture was the possibility (make that probability) of obstacles in my path..... like an ancient redwood falling across the forest path, sometimes obstacles fall across our clearly laid out pathway.  Yet, deep down I knew, through this newly learned lesson of the picture from many years before, that with God guiding us and "holding our hand" as we answer God's call, the obstacles become wisdom as we, with perseverence and God's help, overcome them.